When Grief Goes to School

Authors

• Gabriel Driver, Virginia Commonwealth University

Original Publication Date

2026

Document Type

Presentation

Comments

3rd place winner of the 12th Annual VCU 3MT® Competition, held on October 9, 2026.

Abstract

Misbehavior in K-12 schools often masks unaddressed, ambiguous grief—particularly among Black boys experiencing losses of safety, identity, or belonging. Grounded in psychologist Dr. Tamaura Bryant’s insights on despair, this doctoral research examines how Black male students express grief versus how educators interpret those behaviors. By introducing the concept of "grief fluency," the study encourages school leaders to recognize grief as a root cause of behavioral challenges, promoting supportive intervention over punitive discipline.

Accessibility Note

Content is digitally accessible 2026.

Transcription

From the School of Education, Gabriel Driver. When Grief Goes to School. Gabriel's advisor is Dr. Genevieve Siegel-Hawley. We've all heard someone say, oh, they just have a bad attitude. Some of us have probably had that said about us. But psychologist Dr. Tamer Bryant invites us to consider a different possibility. What if what we call a bad attitude is actually despair? I heard this and I said, hold on, Well, because if a bad attitude can be to spare, then perhaps what we call misbehavior in our K-12 schools can sometimes be unaddressed and ambiguous grief. This gave breath to the lungs of my doctoral research. You see, schools are remarkably fluent in the language of behavior. A student that refuses to participate, call it disengaged. A student that doesn't really rock well with authority, defiant. And a student that disrupts class, well, disrupt it. But what if these words tell us what we're seeing, but doesn't really tell us what the student has experienced? Yes, it could be a death, but grief is not limited to death alone. And for black boys, sometimes the grief could be a loss of safety, identity, belonging, even hope. And yet when these experiences enter the classrooms, they rarely announce themselves by saying, I'm grieving. Sometimes grief gets quiet. Sometimes it withdraws, sometimes grief gets angry, and perhaps it acts out. My research, it asks the question that sits in between what a black boy is experiencing and what an educator believes what they are seeing. So this is what I'm going to do. First, I want to understand how black boys themselves experience, describe, and express grief in schools. Second, I want to understand how educators interpret and respond to those expressions. And then finally, I want to examine the space in between those perspectives. When a black boy communicates grief, what do the schools hear? This is where I'm extending the concept of grief fluency, the capacity of educators and school leaders to recognize grief as a potential antecedent to behavior, interpret it within the student lives experience, and then respond with care as opposed to prematurely defaulting to punishment. it. Now, what I'm not arguing is that every act of behavior is grief. What I am asking is if grief is a possibility that our schools are sufficiently prepared to recognize. Because the questions that we ask ourselves determine what we're capable of seeing. The questions what's wrong with this student and what has this student experienced can lead to very different understandings of the same child. That's my research, y'all. Because -- thank you -- because if despair can be a bad attitude, then perhaps grief can be misbehavior. What if we're punishing grief instead of holding? Thank you.

Rights

© The Author